It's starting to get on my nerves. For about a week now I've been noticing on my way to work that there is five pence in pennies just lying there on the pavement in Kew. OK so they're a bit camouflaged being dull brown coppers sitting on top of a dull brown manhole cover, and they're only pennies, but what kind of ridiculously salubrious area has money lying around for a whole week with nobody picking it up?
The really scary part is they're lying there just outside a primary school - exactly the sort of age of person who considers 5p to be actual real money. But the kids that go to this school are the kind that get chauffeured there in SUVs wearing the sort of ridiculous uniforms that would get them beaten up in any self-respecting inner-London neighbourhood. The little moppet aged all of seven who was climbing out of Mummy's All-Terrain Global Warmer (or whatever it was called) this morning was clutching not just a straw boater but a takeaway from Starbucks proving that you're never too young for a double decaf skinny latte to go. Five pence is clearly beneath her notice.
Obviously I'd pick them up myself but I'm worried they've been superglued down and I'd show myself up in front of my work colleagues as the kind of cheapskate who picks up pennies in the street. I've tried the odd discreet kicking manouevre but they're wedged into the grooves of the manhole cover so I can't see if they're stuck down or not. So they shall continue to bug me until somebody else breaks down and picks them up.
If anyone's feeling particularly hard up they can be found on Kew Green and they were still there this morning. You'd be doing me a favour. And don't spend it all at once.
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